03 August 2020 00:32
The Umbrella Academy's Season 2 finale offers the Hargreeves one last chance to get back home — but given what awaits them in 2019, I'm starting to think they should have stayed in the '60s, after all. It's 2006, and Ben was just killed during the Academy's latest mission… but, in true Sir Reginald fashion, the man offers no sympathy to his children during the eulogy. But Vanya can't stick around for her family's inevitable showdown with the Commission and/or every law enforcement officer in Dallas: When she tries to call Sissy to check on her, she's suddenly jolted by a mental image of Harlan, who is struggling with his newfound power over at Sissy's farm. (She also passes along Ben's final message to Klaus: It wasn't Klaus' fault that Ben's spirit stayed in limbo for so long; Ben had always just been too afraid to go into the light until now. Sob!) Upon arriving at the barn, Vanya manages to convince Sissy — who's understandably freaked out by the Hargreeves right now — to let her speak with Harlan, and she manages to get Harlan to calm down and stop emanating those violent bursts of light.
First, the Handler and Lila arrive, hoping to kill all the siblings once and for all — and when Diego suggests that the two women are vastly outnumbered by the Academy, the Handler teleports in hundreds and hundreds of Commission agents who all begin firing their guns at Diego and Five. Then, after Vanya sends out an enormous wave of energy that knocks down and kills all of the Commission agents at once, the siblings are stunned to find that 1) the Handler and Lila survived Vanya's attack, and 2) Lila has the incredible ability to mirror everyone else's superpowers. While the siblings regroup and try to figure out how Lila can be stopped, Vanya makes an offhand remark that "if [Lila] can do everything we can do, she might as well be one of us" — and you can practically see the light bulbs popping up over everyone's heads. Meanwhile, as Lila and Five continue to fight in the barn, she finally mentions that Five was responsible for killing her parents. He admits to having shot them… but he also shares that the Handler forged the kill order for that particular job, and she accompanied Five on the mission that day, which is rare for Commission executives to do.
It wasn't that the Handler cared about Lila's parents; she just wanted Lila, the same way she's trying to recruit Harlan as this whole ordeal is transpiring. Diego and the other siblings then arrive in the barn, attempting to convince Lila that the Handler has been using her this whole time, and they can serve as Lila's real family from here on out, if she'll just stop trying to hurt them. 'SECONDS, NOT DECADES' | Five, who managed not to be instantly killed by the Handler's gunshots, suddenly has an epiphany as he looks around at his family's bodies: He remembers Sir Reginald telling him, just a few days ago, not to use his time travel power so ambitiously. And as that realization dawns on him, Five manages to stand up and travel back in time by just a few minutes, resurrecting all of his siblings as he returns to the moment just before the Handler shot everyone in the barn. This time, though, Five is able to grab the Handler's gun before she can do any damage — that is, until the Swede shows up a moment later anyway and still kills the Handler, just as he'd done the first time around. For once, it seems the siblings' work is finally done — and with all of those dead Commission agents still lying in the grass outside, there's no shortage of available briefcases that can take the Hargreeves back to 2019. And that's not all: After the siblings return to 2019 — the day after the original apocalypse was supposed to take place — they notice something odd about the Academy. Even worse, Sir Reginald is puzzled when the siblings insist this is the Umbrella Academy. Callen, who stars in the US comedy series The Goldbergs and appeared in films including Joker and The Hangover, has been accused by four women in a report by the Los Angeles Times. "Let me be very clear: I have never raped, forced myself upon any woman nor offered to trade stage time for sex. And I can only hold my head up high, remain true to myself, my family, my audience and know that I will not allow the cancel culture to subvert what I know and as importantly, what they know, is the truth." Actor Kathryn Fiore Tigerman alleged that Callen raped her in 1999 while she was an aspiring actor, after he offered to show her around Los Angeles. A third woman, a stand-up comedian, alleged that Callen suggested she give him oral sex in exchange for stage time in 2017. In a further, longer statement, Callen wrote: "Let me be very clear: I have never raped, forced myself upon a woman nor have I offered to trade stage time for sex. And I can only hold my head up high, remain true to myself, my family, my audience and know that I will not allow the cancel culture to subvert what I know and as importantly, what these women know, is the truth."