24 December 2019 08:45

Dear Santa, The first thing you’ll want to know is what I am wearing.

norad tracks santa

Dear Santa, The first thing you'll want to know is what I am wearing. As my 3,500 Instagram followers already know, today I have opted for a £1,000 Rochas skirt with £2,300 Valextra handbag. I can't understand why everyone isn't picking these kinds of stylish, feminine, sustainable and ethically sourced pieces. It's a mystery. While on the subject of fashion, I hesitate to get personal but I feel your own ensemble may be letting down the side.

In Boris's wonderful post-Brexit Britain, I'm not sure your fur-trimmed and excessively red outfit really cuts it. Couldn't you find something in a quiet taupe, perhaps with a pussy bow? Dolce & Gabbana do some really quite nicely understated pieces if you look hard. Also, the elves might…

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